Special Message to scary 15 year olds who claim they also like penis: 

Ewww.....

THiS Page engineered buy THE webnancy himself...LOOSEcANNOn.  Bitch here

A complete set of steak knives?! Well! Alls forgiven then!

lOOSEcANNON

 

ADMIT NOTHING, DENY EVERYTHING, MAKE COUNTER ACCUSATIONS 

 

WWND Industries SECOND Magazine Interview 

November 2nd, 2001 - Raynham Office-A clip from the recent KLIXX magazine interview of our co-founder, your webnancy, lOOSEcANNON.            

 

Slut- The interviewer
LC- looseCANNON

 

Slut- Thank you Mr. Cannon for taking the time out of your hectic schedule to to have this interview with us

LC- Mr. Cannon? 

Slut- Er....sorry loosecannon, may i call you loose?

LC- Well, i cant say as anyone has before and bearing my asshole is VIRGIN, i dont see the relativity, and furthermore, your spelled my name wrong. The OOSE and ANNON should be capitalized. Dickhead.

Slut- Sorry again Mr. Cannon....

LC- Back with that mister shit again huh? Listen, SLUT, would i call you Mr. Slut?

Slut- Uh, ah, uh...no.

LC- Thats damn right! Mr. is a show of respect, and you, fucknut, certainly dont deserve any. Not that i believe in the foolish concept in the first place. 
Well that, and your a girl. We call them misses.

Slut- Ah........

LC- On with it wormy....

At this point, THE NICK wanders unexpectedly onto the set of the interview. He crosses the stage and walks smack dab into a water bubbler. He calls to no in particular, "oh, i'll get that. Probably for me anyways..." and wanders off in another direction...

LC- Ah, at least he remembered not to wear pants...
Ah, goc, love that man....a true martyr to the cause...

Slut- Um.....What?

LC- [Stands up suddenly and salutes] AYE! BE THERE WITHOUT YOUR PANTS CAPTAIN!

Off stage THE NICK turns dazedly and abruptly stumbles to the ground. He his heard shouting "Who put that plant there?!"

Slut- Um...wasnt that you, lc, before the show began? 

LC- [aside to slut, 'SHHHH!'] Aye! Lookout there captain! Them bastards work in pairs!

The nick screams in panic, "Ah! 2 of them?!"

LC- Aye cap'n, the other squirrelly fucker be around here somewhere, be off with you before he catches you unawares sir!

Then nick shrieks, and bolts down a side corridor. 

Moments later, a loud ruckus is heard. 

The nick swears aloud, "What the fuck? Who put this plant here??!" and can be heard storming off in in a streak of swearing mumbles...

<Long silence.>

<Long, uncomfortable silence.>

Slut- So ah....um.....that was the nick huh?

LC- YOU BLOODY BASTARD! [Tackles slut]

 

See the rest of the exciting interview in newsstands last july! 

 

Some highlights include:

"Slut-So if you and the nick were stranded in the mountains you'd try to use communication systems on the plane for a last ditch satellite missile redirection to the house of barbara streisand rather than call for help?!"

"LC- PAH! They cant fire me, I'm a co-founder!"

"Slut-So what your saying to me...is that in a matter of hours, you could single-handedly defeat an entire brigade of oprah winfrey supporters without the aid of Kentucky Fried Chicken?"

"LC- You know the real beauty of sodomy is the brussel sprouts..."

"Slut- [unconcious.]"

"LC- You know...without those androids...i could have never developed that [INTERNAL SECRETS: CLASSIFIED< ONLY THE NICK AND LC MAY KNOW (the nick: know what?)]"

"Slut- So you really got kicked out of Yugoslavia?"

"LC- Ya so we're doing this corporate takeover thing, and i got this great idea to use some RABID, SNOW WEEVILS..."

"Slut- So thats squirrel pudding, huh..."
<--LC:Hellooo, MST3k-->

"LC- FUCK YOU, barbara streisand!"

"LC-All i knew was i needed lesbians! and I needed them now! <pause with shuffling of feet>
Well tell me man! What would you have written your ideas on?!"

 

See that and the gripping conclusion about the design of the heralded WWND website....

"LC: Well half-ass is one our mottos...and if it isnt, i can add that to the site in 2 minutes! See our design is such i can make sweeping changes like that...Admittedly, it'll take me at least 3-9 weeks to actually do it..."

 

Klixx is a leading magazine for adult webmasters. Really.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh! so you want to play dirty, do you?